Lately I've been completely overrun by day-to-day obligations.  My diet's gone to shit- though admittedly it wasn't fantastic to start- and I haven't had the mental energy to do any of the academic reading I'd been planning to do in preparation for school. I DID manage to fill out my paperwork for my federal loan, though, and to do it with only a minimum of hyperventilation.  Here's to small victories.  My mind is terribly scattered- lots of stuff needs my attention, and since a good chunk of my resources have already wandered off to upstate New York, I'm even more frazzled than ever.  This is all ok, mind you.  I'm still so relieved about starting school that I'll take whatever the next few months decide to throw at me.  I just hope that I can regain some semblance of balance soon, so that I can start being proactive again. And maybe get to the gym while I'm at it.

Pssst....check out this great blog

http://blogs.plos.org/speakeasyscience/

Sorry, as-of-yet-nonexistent readers.  I've been in a bit of a rut lately.  I haven't done much aside from work and watch reruns of Big Bang Theory on DVR. I'm trying to get my butt in gear, but to be honest it hasn't quite happened yet.  However, This morning I've managed to get a corned beef and cabbage dinner into the crockpot in time to cook it on LOW (for those of you who don't cook in crockpots, that's kind of a big deal for those of us who aren't super organized) so I feel like now might be a good time to start raising my standard of living.


I've got a few nifty links I've come across lately.  I'm sad that I didn't think to save a few from last week, but here's one of this morning's-


An international team has recently sequenced Otzi the Iceman's genome. I'm no paleogenomicist, but I still think that's really cool. I mean, The guy's been dead for over 5,300 years and yet we are fairly certain he had brown eyes and heart disease.

Let the Fun Begin!

I GOT INTO MY FIRST CHOICE SCHOOL!!

Exciting, no?

I've already secured my spot and sent my apologies to the other university. I'll be at Binghamton  this fall, working with an awesome and down-to-earth group of people I had the pleasure of meeting a few months ago. 

It's know I mentioned this in the last post, but I'm still amazed my how quickly I manage to vacillate between eager anticipation and utter dread when I think about moving.  It's not the studying or writing papers that gets to me...not for nothing, I've been doing that (on a lesser level, I KNOW) for years.  School I've got covered.  It's what I DO.  But moving to a city where I don't know anyone, and leaving my beautiful sweet dog behind to do it....that shit's terrifying when I think about it too much.  And I'm always thinking about it too much.
           I am trying to detach from the present and take a broader perspective, though, because I NEED to do this program.  I allowed Other Crap to take over once before (a story for another time, and one that requires bourbon), and I've been given a second chance.  I want to make the most of it and not have to fight myself every step of the way. Of course, it goes without saying (or should from now on) that even more importantly, I WANT to be there. More than anything.  Fascinating research, intelligent and curious colleagues, local dive bars where my baby sister isn't the bartender...I get so friggin' excited about it I wanna do cartwheels (but I don't, because I've never ever in my whole life been able to do a cartwheel).  And then the anxiety gremlin creeps up and tries to get a vise grip on my chest and I don't wanna go anyplace at all, because ohmygod something TERRIBLE could happen...

...because parking my ass on my mother's couch for the past two years has prevented so much of the world's tragedy.

I've let the little monster run my life for a really long time, and it's time for that to end.  Screw you, anxiety gremlin. Take a hike.


(That's my version of a pep talk.  Sorry if it gave anyone a headache.)